so it's my life.. no one else's.. it's mine.. i do whatever i want with it.. i could even end it if that's what i see myself doing with it.. but i don't wanna end it (not now at least).. and i actually don't want it to end.. i ain't living in the french riviera with cash poping out of my asshole.. i ain't super famous like brad pitt, beckham, zeta jones, and j-lo combined in one... i don't own a ferrari enzo or have real estate in every major city in the world.. i'm only a normal, every-day guy whole lives in the capital city of one of the developing countries with an amount of cash only enough to sustain his moderate needs.. i'm only famous among my friends, and they ain't that much anyway.. i only own a 1.0 liter, 98 make VW.. and i'm enjoying my life.. i love my life.. i love what i've become through those 28 years of living on this planet.. but what's life?.. this thing i'm having and happy about, what is it?.. is it a dream or a fantasy?.. well, no.. cuz i have another fantasy-land life i sometimes run to (in other words, 'escape to') that is totally different from my real life.. mainly made up of all the things i want in real life but can't have or can't do.. but still, i love my life.. with such a reality-show like life, u have sets of rules u have to follow.. some r imposed by nature (like the fact that i can't fly for instance).. others r introduced by nature due to the fact that i'm a human being (i eat when i'm hungry).. some r just there in me since the day i was born (like hating chocolate).. and some r man made.. those i hate.. i believe in god... i believe in fate.. but i believe in freedom.. i believe in the power of choice.. i use the ability to observe, process, and analyze to come out with ideas.. i don't just follow, i evaluate.. i need to be convinced.. it's a form of security.. cuz a part of those rules nature introduced to human beings is hating insecurity.. i get my security from knowing and practicing my intellect.. i see it as a minimum for life.. to be able to think... people don't die just when they stop breathing, or when their hearts stop beating.. they die when they stop thinking.. and the tragedy of my life is that the people around me stopped doing exactly that.. they just follow.. they don't evaluate anymore.. ok ok, i ain't totting my own horn or anything.. like i'm the only one worth having a life.. so let me put it this way.. people around me didn't really stop thinking.. but they r using all this thinking power in them to try and find ways and reasons for living in a certain mold.. i hate that.. why?.. cuz they end up either with trivial explanations and excuses for their ways of living or tend to relate every thing to super powers that control our destinies.. they just never stop and wonder why they r sticking to that mold.. that that mold is something they control not something controlling them.. i have to admit.. sometimes i ain't open as i wish i was... but at least i'm trying.. so why do u people make it so hard for me.. i'm gonna live my life the way i choose.. no matter what.. i have enjoyed, i am enjoying, and i will enjoy every minute of it..
