a year went by.. with all the good and all the bad.. but it was mostly the bad that hung on and had an effect.. a year went by.. and all i can recall are hard times.. a year went by.. it feels like one long dream that was close to being a nightmare.. only it didn't stun me into a snap wakeup, and just kept on going.. a year went by.. and here i am, right where i was, right where i deserve to be.. right where i'm meant to be according to the fate and destiny gods..
time is not meaningless, but it is in my case.. time, they say, can be the only medicine, or at least a painkiller, but in my case it was the salt added to the bleeding wound.. time, a year to be exact, and still i feel every bit of sadness and sorrow.. to the extent that i don't really feel anything anymore.. time turned me emotionless..
now i have to go through another year. and then another.. and it goes on.. time goes on and nothing seems to stop it.. not even the meaningless and emptiness of life..
i'm standing there, looking at me in the mirror.. not feeling anything.. or maybe i am but i just don't see it.. maybe that's why i'm looking at the mirror.. trying to see.. there's another me over there.. and i just hold this tiny piece of hope that maybe he's happy.. maybe in his world he has a chance.. maybe life on the other side is indeed greener.. that's the least i expect if this life had any sense of fairness or sympathy.. let him be happy.. and let me see that in him every time i look in a mirror.. don't take that away from me.. it's all i have left..
bye 2010.. welcome 20xx
UPDATE: RIP Jack Kevorkian
